How to Sign Your Name the Way I Sign Mine

People ask for my autograph all the time, mostly my family, on birthday cards. Over the years, my signature has grown. It now has its own steps, and people have asked me to slow down so they can follow along. Here they are.

The Steps

1. Choose a big pen. The biggest one in the drawer. A marker is ideal.
2. Begin with a capital D. A big one, with a loop at the top, like a hot air balloon.
3. Now the O, the N, the N and the Y. Small. They know their place.
4. Underline it. Twice. Once for me, and once for the people watching.
5. Add a star. Every great signature needs a star, in the top corner.
6. Blow on it, gently. It needs to dry, and it likes the attention.

The Problem

My signature no longer fits on anything. Not on checks, not on forms and not on birthday cards, where it covers the message and most of the picture.

Last week, a delivery man asked me to sign for a parcel on his little screen. After the D, the screen was full. He said it was the most beautiful D he had ever seen, and then asked if I could do a shorter one.

So I did the D on its own. He said even that was the biggest he’d seen all week. The D alone is now my short signature, for emergencies and parcels. The full version is still available on request, with the star.