My Front Door
Notes for the Person Watching My House
I'm away for a week, so a house-sitter is looking after everything. I left a few notes. They're on every door.
Before my trip to Rome, I hired a house-sitter to water the plants, collect the mail and keep my house company. She seemed very capable. Still, I left a few notes, just to be sure. Here they are, room by room.
The Notes
Front door. Welcome! Please wipe your feet. Both of them, for the same amount of time.
Kitchen. Help yourself to anything in the fridge, except the cake, the ice cream and the cheese. The carrots are all yours.
Living room. That’s my chair. Please sit on the other chair, and face my chair, as a sign of respect.
Plants. Water them on Tuesday. Talk to them on Wednesday. Tell them I miss them, and that I’ll bring them a present.
Mail. Put it on my desk, sorted by importance. Anything that looks like a fan letter goes on top.
The neighbor’s cat. It will sleep on my car. Don’t argue with it. We have an agreement.
Bedtime. Please lock up and switch the lights off, except the one above my portrait.
When I Got Home
Everything was perfect. The plants were greener, the mail was sorted, and my chair had not been touched at all, as far as I could tell.
She left me one note of her own, on the fridge: “Your house is lovely, and your notes were very thorough. Next time, I’ll need to charge extra for reading them.”
Frequently Asked Questions
Did the cat behave?
It slept on my car, as usual. The agreement is working beautifully, for the cat.
Will you hire her again?
Yes. I've already written the notes for next time. There are more of them.