The School Gym (Table One, and Most of the Floor)
My Science Fair Volcano Was Too Big for the Gym
Every science fair has a baking soda volcano. Most fit on a table. Mine was as tall as the basketball hoop. The gym was not ready.
Every science fair has a baking soda volcano. Most of them fit on a table. I don’t do table. I built mine as tall as the basketball hoop and brought forty boxes of baking soda. Here’s my project poster, exactly as presented.
Hypothesis
If you add a lot of vinegar to a lot of baking soda, you get a lot of foam. If you add even more, you get history.
Method
- Build a volcano out of papier-mâché, three meters tall.
- Paint it lava red, with a navy stripe. Very distinguished.
- Pour in all the baking soda. Then all the vinegar. Then step back. Farther than that.
Results
The foam reached the bleachers. Then the trophy cabinet. Then the principal, who was wearing a good suit, though not as good as mine. The volcano was a tremendous success. The principal disagreed. We’ve agreed to disagree, and I’ve agreed to miss next year’s science fair. Some discoveries are too big for one gym.
Frequently Asked Questions
What's in a baking soda volcano?
Baking soda, vinegar and ambition. Mostly ambition.
Who cleaned up?
The janitor. A hero. I've thanked him in every speech since.