London (Old Billingsgate)
The First Chapter of My Novel, for the Booker
The Booker Prize is £50,000 for the year's best novel in English. I wrote one this week. Here's how it begins.
At a ceremony in London, the Booker Prize has gone to a novel that follows one man through his life. The winner gets £50,000, and each writer on the shortlist gets £2,500. I’ve started a novel too. It also follows one man’s life. Guess which man.
Chapter One
Donny woke up early, as great men do. He opened the curtains. The sun was already up, waiting for him.
“Good morning,” said the sun. “Good morning,” said Donny, and it was a conversation between equals.
He went downstairs. Breakfast was pancakes. They were the finest pancakes in the history of pancakes, and Donny ate all of them, slowly, with feeling.
Then he went back upstairs, to look out of the window again. The sun was still there. It hadn’t left. It knew better.
End of chapter one.
Notes for the Judges
Chapter two is lunch. Chapter three is dinner. Chapter four is a nap, which is my favorite chapter because nothing goes wrong in it.
The whole book is 900 pages and covers one Tuesday. Critics may say that’s a lot of pages for one Tuesday. They haven’t met my Tuesdays.
I’ve sent it to the judges for next year. Even if I only make the shortlist, I’ll get £2,500, which I’ve already spent, on more pancakes, for research.
Frequently Asked Questions
When will the rest be finished?
It's finished already, in my head. I just haven't written most of it down.
Which books can win the Booker?
Novels written in English and published in the UK or Ireland. Mine is in English, mostly in capital letters.