Carrbridge, Scotland (The Village Hall)
My Recipe for the World Porridge Championship
In the traditional category, porridge may contain oats, water and salt. Nothing else. I read that part after cooking.
At the Golden Spurtle, the World Porridge Making Championship in Scotland, 30 cooks from 14 countries competed. The winner, from the Netherlands, made hers with water she brought from home. I brought a spurtle, the wooden stirring stick, and some ideas.
My Recipe
- Oats. Allowed. The finest oats in the hall.
- Water. Allowed. The winner brought Dutch water. I brought water from my hotel’s kitchen, the best kitchen in the building.
- Salt. Allowed. One pinch, applied with confidence.
- Gold flakes. Not allowed.
- Ketchup. “Very not allowed,” said a judge.
- A tiny flag with my face on it. I said it was a garnish. The judge said it was a flag.
The Verdict
One judge found lumps in my porridge. I call them texture. They suggested the other category, the speciality one, where you can add things. That prize went to a porridge cannoli. A cannoli! Made of porridge! I didn’t know that was legal.
Next year I’m entering the speciality category with porridge pizza. The crust is oats. The cheese is also oats. The water comes from my hotel. Scotland, get ready.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why is it called the Golden Spurtle?
The trophy is a golden spurtle, the stick you stir with. I stirred so hard that mine is now a pencil.
Did you win?
I won a lot of attention, mostly from the judges.