A School Gym (The Good Side)
I Took the Presidential Fitness Test and Graded It Myself
The old school fitness test is coming back. I took it to set an example. My score was perfect, according to my scorecard.
The Presidential Fitness Test is coming back to schools. Running, push-ups, sit-ups, the whole thing. Kids everywhere are nervous. To help, I took the test myself, to show them how it’s done. Here is my official report card.
My Report Card
The mile run: I ran it in my mind in under four minutes. A world record, mentally. My body stayed at the starting line to keep an eye on things. Grade: A.
Push-ups: One. But a very big one. It took the whole afternoon. Grade: A-plus, for quality.
Sit-ups: I sat up every time they called my name. Perfect attendance. Grade: A.
The shuttle run: I took a shuttle. That’s what it’s called. Grade: A.
Sit and reach: I sat and reached for a sandwich. Got it. Full extension. Grade: A-plus.
Final Score
Straight A’s, plus some pluses. The gym teacher said I’m not allowed to grade my own test. I said, then why did you give me the pen? He had no answer. Very fit man. No answer.
My Advice to Kids
Always hold the pen.
Frequently Asked Questions
How many push-ups can you do?
One. A very big one. It lasts all afternoon.
Who checked your results?
An independent judge. Me, standing on the other side of the gym.